False Scares

I rented a movie last night, a scary thriller. I won't say which one because I don't really have anything good to say about it and won't warn you about it, so that you can join me in my misery of viewing it. Actually, I will warn you. As my friend Greg says, "Stay away from renting any flick that has 'alternate endings.'" Good call; if they can't choose which ending they want, how good can the film be?

The false scares in movies drive me nuts. For example, how is it everyone who's haunted or who has an ax murderer living in their attic owns a cat, just so that they can scare us w/a "Oh no, the ghost/killer is behind the door... Oh, no, it's just the cat." Even if they don't own a cat, one has snuck into their place from nowhere. (No doubt it entered through the same place the ghost or killer got in.) Cat just appears for the false scare. Even "Alien", a very good movie, has the cat. They have this cat fly all the way up in space w/them, just so that they can have a false scare or two w/it. Talk about going out of your way for a gimmick.

Say what you want about the poor acting and script in movies like "Saw", but these films do a GREAT job of not having any false scares. Things move along really well and keep the viewers on toes (when they're not laughing at some of the other unbelievable stuff, anyway).

I think I'll write a short comedy script in which someone is terrorized by cats. He keeps opening doors, a cat scares 'em, he runs away frantic. Eventually he opens a door to find an ax murderer, and is relieved. "Thank God! Are you here to kill the cats?" Then he can get killed or something. At least it's original.